Trudging Through a Season

We’ve been walking through a weird, rough season of our life here at the Remark household. So many huge changes and transitions are taking place as we prepare to leave this place we have called home for the first year of our marriage, our first purchase together, our first remodel projects, design projects, the place we came home to first as husband and wife. We’re preparing to leave our families and our friends and the places and people we know and love to open another chapter of our lives. It’s exciting, and it’s downright hard. 

Amidst the decision making and processing of this move, life threw us another curve ball (isn’t that how it usually goes?). My Grandpa, who I grew up with, was diagnosed with cancer. The kind that doesn’t give you much time to get your life in order, the time that doesn’t allow you to experience your lasts to the fullest, the kind that strangles the life right out of you until the very end. And I thought it was downright hard to move. That was until I sat holding the hand of a man whose life was slipping away from him. Maybe there isn’t even a word that describes that emotion.

And as I spent the last few weeks of Grandpa’s life by his side, so many things entered my mind about what made him such a different, special man. Out of that thinking came this desire to write down what I hold so near and dear about the man I was lucky to call my grandpa.

What is a legacy?

A legacy is something you leave on this earth long after your soul leaves your body. A legacy is something the ones near and dear to you hold onto when they can no longer hold onto your hand, when they can no longer hear your laughter, when they can no longer see the proud sparkle in your eyes as they walk into the room.

Leaving a legacy is leaving a little bit of you for us to enjoy when you’ve left this earth and gone to be in the presence of the angels.

It is impossible to walk this earth with such love, dedication and passion as grandpa has and to not leave a legacy so great that it will live on long after his last breath has been breathed.   

Leaving a legacy doesn’t mean leaving money, it doesn’t mean leaving possessions, it doesn’t even mean leaving accolades. No, leaving a legacy is far more than that. Leaving a legacy is leaving your wife of 57 years with fond memories of love. It’s leaving 5 children who will sit by your side until the very end not out of obligation but because they want to squeeze every moment of love out of you. Leaving a legacy means leaving tears in the eyes of loved ones because they know that life on this earth will be just a little duller without your presence.

It’s proudly providing, deeply loving, faithfully serving, generously giving, tirelessly working all in the name of love.

A legacy is something you leave in the hearts of your children, and their children and their children for generations to come. It’s the fond memories and wonderful stories that come only because you did the very best you could to love your family unselfishly, unfailingly, and persistently until the very end.

Talk to his wife, or his kids, or his grandkids, and it won’t take you long to discover this man has left a legacy.

He has left a legacy by choosing to love. By pointing them to Jesus. By carrying burdens. By fixing skinned knees. By healing broken hearts.

As I reflected on Wednesday evening about what made Grandpa so special, about what made him a man that was so iconic and going to be so immensely missed, I thought of many, many things. Stories that could be shared for days. Stories that would make us laugh, and cry, and yes- even cringe. Stories of a man who spent his whole life putting it all out there for those he loved. But amongst those memories I boiled it down to these 5 words. Grandpa did everything in life with passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

Whether it was singing in the church choir, serving on the city council, running his own business, raising his children, or loving his wife he did it with passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love. For as far back as I can remember, I have witnessed, time and time again, a man who showed up every day of his life exuding passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

Bring the smallest task to Grandpa, and you could be certain he would get it done above and beyond what you asked of him because of his passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

Come to him with a heavy heart, a burden, or a problem and he would fix it because of his passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

Come to grandpa and he would share his stories, his chair, his iced tea, his wafer cookies, his juice jugs, his Pink Cow recipe, his wisdom, his advice (sometimes unsought) but most importantly his passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

What is a legacy?

A legacy is when a man lives his life demonstrating these values so greatly that they become a part of each of his family members. A legacy is passing on your passion, pride, commitment, dedication and love.

You’ve done well, grandpa. Thank you for the very best kind of legacy.

So we will continue to walk through this season of life, resting assured that we are exactly where God wants us at this moment and that no matter where life takes us we will walk hand-in-hand looking ahead with anticipation of what is to come!